(More) Things Middle Schoolers Say

Okay, I’m back. Again. This time having completed my last week as an aide before returning to the same school (yay!) as a student teacher! I realize I haven’t written much about what it took to get to this point, but let me tell you: it required a lot of persistence. And prayer. And patience I didn’t think I had.

Oh, I jumped through the usual hoops: pre-req exams, school applications, multiple LiveScans (my apologies to the techs who spent upwards of fifteen minutes rolling because I have the nonexistent fingerprints of an old lady)…but then my plan hit a snag I just knew would set me back about two years. Until, by the grace of God, it didn’t.

Seven months later, I’m finally at this point: student teaching.

I truly believe this is where God wants me; otherwise, I wouldn’t have gotten here. And He’ll help this night owl through early mornings, 140 new faces and personalities, evening classes, and somehow figuring out that work-school-life balance.

Until then, more things middle schoolers say:

First off, Miss Vanilla has made a comeback. Weird Boy has gone off to high school and I haven’t seen him since, and still Peanut Butter (his friends’ nickname for him, not mine) managed to come up with this one on his own. Also like Weird Boy, he thinks I’m older than 40.

Peanut Butter: Miss Vanilla, how old are you?

Smart Man #1: You never ask a woman her age.

Smart Man #2: Yeah, you always have to say twenty years less than you think.

Peanut Butter: So, like, 30?

We recently started reading Esperanza Rising as a class, which follows a young girl who escapes to the U.S. with her mother after the death of her father. Students were asked to writing a diary entry from the point of view of an immigrant leaving their homeland.

Student #1: Dear Diary, I’m writing from the FedEx cargo plane I stowed away in…

Student #2: Dear Diary, today I left my country with my wife and two sons…

Student #1: Haha, eww. You’re married? But you’re twelve!

Student #2: I’m pretending.

* I should also mention I found it impossible to explain who Diary is, and why we write to here as if she were a person.

Ah, how to describe The Little Prince? He talks like a little adult but still dreams about inventing flying cars and houses that float in case of a flood. He thanks all of his teachers every.single.day. I’ve even heard the girls talking about how nice he is.

The journal question of the day asked they would do if they won the lottery.

The Little Prince: If I won the lottery, I would give half of it to charity and save the rest for investment for my children’s school. When my children grow up I will tell them that money doesn’t matter. Because a robber could take all their money and all their things, but they cannot take their education.


Okay this one’s more of a “things middle schoolers do” one.

It was the first week of school and Sharp Shooter, a seventh grader, didn’t want to lose his class schedule so he pasted it to the bill of his baseball hat. He’s also the cheeriest aspiring lawyer I’ve ever met.

It was around this time that his classmate, Crayon Thrower, blew hand sanitizer into his own eye. There are different kinds of thirteen-year-old boys in this world…but they’ve all perfected the water bottle toss and I hate it.

Last, but not least…Class Clown. Because what would school be without them?

Class Clown was goofing off while the class was filling out a chapter outline. Obvs. So when he went up to the computer to add his group’s findings, he started writing the perfect bullet point about Africa…concise, on point, and beautifully written. If only they weren’t studying China.

Class Clown: But Smart Aleck told me to write it! (Turns to Smart Aleck) Gaaah! You ugly banana peel!


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